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deck the goat

another goat?

burr86 woke me up this morning, bright and early. "I really wish I didn't have to be the one to tell you this," he said, "But I think deflatermouse found another goat." Oh, man, was I peeved. What was Simon thinking? LJ is my turf, and as long as you're on my turf, you play by my rules. And that means: no other goats!

I called Simon and confronted him. "Is there another goat in your life, Simon?"

"Uh, what?"

"I mean, I'll understand if you're not interested in our relationship anymore. People grow, people change."

"Oh, Frank, baby. You're still my one and only."

"So who's the other goat?"

I heard a laugh on the other end, one of those laughs that told me there was so much more to the story than I thought. "Well," Simon explained, "you've been such a great helper around the office. Always taking care of LJ, always making sure everything runs as best as you can. So I figured, for Christmas, that I'd get another goat." He emailed me a picture.



Okay, fine, I'll admit. That's one hot goat, and if I weren't in a committed relationship with LJ, I'd even ... ahem, nevermind. But that wasn't the point! Simon! Another goat! It's true! "We don't --"

He cut me off before I could finish. "Not for us! Do you think there's any goat who could replace you? I bought a goat from Oxfam, so we could spread the joy of having a goat to other families." (Simon's a bit of a geek, he even said "a href equals" and gave me the link over the phone.) "I love you, and you love me, and I wanted to share our love with others."

I breathed a sigh of relief as he continued, "I didn't want to tell you yet. I wanted it to be a surprise."

It was indeed a surprise! And, selfishly, was I relieved to hear that Simon wasn't cheating on me with another goat. But what a great present, indeed -- it was such a great present that I came to post about it right away! And, take it from me: whatever holiday you celebrate, consider giving the joy of a goat next year. Just make sure to tell any other goats in your life before they get suspicious!

Happy holidays, everyone!

Comments

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MERRY CHRISTMAS! :D
uh...what??? i don't think i've ever been more confused by an LJ post in my life.
Frank temporarily felt betrayed by Simon because he thought he was getting replaced, when in fact that goat is one that Simon bought to give to a needy family, and Frank thinks that the goat is a compelte hottie.

basically.
Awe! Frank, I think you to would make a cute couple.. You know, if things didn't work out with LJ. (You should so get her digits)

(And Yes, I'll be giving a goat next year! That's such a great idea.)

Merry Christmas!
ah...I <3 LJ.
Happy Holidays back to you, Frank! (:
Shame on you.

Goats are usually more secular-minded.
Oh, I am! But if Simon wanted to surprise me for Christmas, far be it from me to say no...
aww there will always only be you frank! MErry Christmas!
Merry Christmas to you too, Frank! I'll keep your gift suggestion in mind for next year. (I mean, who doesn't want a goat?)
Of course, if you don't use money that has that funny (pound) symbol, you could visit here and pay for a goat in the currency of your choice.
Looking at the American site just prompted me to post this in my journal:

Our infamous LJ mascot, frank, just posted about how one of his friends donated a goat to Oxfam as a holiday present to Frank. So I explored this, and I'm puzzed...

The UK Oxfam site that was cited in Frank's post allows one to donate goats, alpacas, and donkeys. But these four-legged creatures are nowhere to be found on the American site, which only allows donation of a can of worms, a crocodile, a camel, a cow, or their best seller, a sheep. For reference, Oxfam Canada permits donation of goats, donkeys, and chickens. Australia permits donations of ducks and buffalo. Hong Kong also permits donation of goats. New Zealand also provides goats and donkeys. Even the Netherlands has donkeys. But not the US. Oxfam US is the only that that doesn't have goats or donkeys.

All we have is sheep, cows, camels, and crocodiles. And sheeps are our best seller. Why no goats?

Lastly, I wonder if sheeps are a best seller simply due to Texas A&M students.
Hahaha that's like the Calista Flockhart of goats
Dear LJ crew,
You guys are awesome.
<3,
Me
ahref! Ha
Merry Christmas Frank. Maybe you and that goat-chick should get together. Hmmmmmm. That's an idea. Make her a cake of pants. Who could resist pants? Munches and spits out lintballs!
I actually gave a goat in honor of to two of my friends this year through http://www.heifer.org/ which is another good site

Merry Christmas!
I gave my sister a Heifer Inc. water buffalo, her being a Veggie Tales fan and all. :)
Thats what I say, share the Happiness, Happy happy happy to one and all, in whatever form it comes.
Hey Frank....that goat's not baaaaaaad *nudge-nudge*
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!
Happy holidays, Frank. And don't worry--it's not LJ without you! :D
Replace frank! Blasphemy! Merry x-mas, hope you get lots of pants. =)
Oh I saw this news article (http://www.thepatrioticvanguard.com/article.php3?id_article=619) a while back, looks like a great job opportunity for frank.
Yeah, that is a pretty smokin' goat. Keep it away from RMS!

Happy holidays.
frank...will you marry me?
Merry Christmas and a happy new year that is filled with lots of tasty pants!
That is such a sweet idea! ♥
i'm glad you posted about this! my family and i gave a heard of 10 cows - because we're from wisconsin - but had we not done the cows, goats were second on the list!
Merry Christmas Frank!
Long time no see. Where have you been?
Frank, you are looking particularly festive today. And your lady friend is absolutely delicious.
:) My mom bought us a cow from there for Christmas. Its such a nice thing to do.
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